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Why should you believe in love?

Translated by Ana Santos - [email protected]
Final revision by Françoise Killick - [email protected]

We are going through a very peculiar period, mainly in respect to subjects that concern the heart, affective relations and our availability to love or, at least, try to.

No matter how much we talk about these possibilities, how much we look forward for great romances, there is something contradictory in the air… We have a general and well-known difficulty in trusting the others, a fear to surrender, besides the apparent (or real) human wickedness, in detriment of what has been promised and what was expressed as being a deep and genuine feeling.

It looks as if a person were in love one day… and, on the following, everything were over. So, why should we go on believing in love? Why should we go on investing, betting, and opening space for new relationships?

You know, no matter of how much I believe – and I truly do! – that there are noble, sincere and transparent persons who do look forward to living relationships founded on respect for themselves and the others, sometimes some incidents really shock me and I inevitably ask: myself if insisting in this search would not be pure innocence and even stubbornness.

Couples who have everything to be happy, people who really want happiness, disheartened and fragile men and women that would give their best in trying to feel a little – even if just a little – less lost, less confused, safer, more fulfilled… and however, fall in traps without knowing how to avoid them.

Lies, deceits, pains, incoherencies or mere and sudden diagnoses of what seemed to be a special meeting suddenly has no flavor… What a mess..., how sad and miserable such a situation appears... and gives each partner - or both - a dreadful feeling of not knowing what happened.

And as we experience one disenchantment after another, we loose our faith in life, our joy and become disheartened, empty, hurt, and not willing to give it a new try...

It would be easy for me to talk about so many couples that I see in love, happy and completing each other… because I do believe this is possible and I can see many relationships like these. However, lately, I have been receiving testimonies of people who feel incapable of engaging in a new relationship because they can no longer face unhappiness and, definitively, refuse to be disappointed once more…

Such people cannot see or believe something that does not happen to them, but I still have something that, in my opinion, will convince us not to give up.

We create our world. We are people: you and me, and all that live in your house, everybody you know and also who you don’t. Love and relationships are reflections of each one of us, of our choices and intentions. The world is a consequence of these people. And this includes you and me, and some six billions of souls.

Therefore, in order to change this reality, something inside us must change in such a strong and positive manner that it will be able to change this external reality. And however insignificant you feel your belief, your choice or your attitude looks towards the immensity of the universe, this is just an illusion.
You can hardly imagine the importance you have in this scenery and in the intense process of evolution and mature ness our planet is going through. And if you give up, if you do not believe in love, much will be lost. Hundreds of people will suffer for that reason.
You may even not believe what I’m saying but it is a fact and it is logic. This is why I do ask you to take a deep breath and give yourself one more chance, with no restrictions and without pointing fingers at each other, but keeping in mind you are doing your utmost for it to work out.

Thus, love will become bigger and deeper and even if it is only your grandsons who enjoy the outcomes, the world will be happier and with more love because of you!

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Rosana Braga é Especialista em Relacionamento e Autoestima, Autora de 9 livros sobre o tema. Psicóloga e Coach. Busca através de seus artigos, ajudar pessoas a se sentirem verdadeiramente mais seguras e atraentes, além de mostrar que é possível viver relacionamentos maduros, saudáveis e prazerosos.
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