Marriages
por Mon Liu em STUM WORLDAtualizado em 14/09/2004 19:51:09
Translated by Mário Sérgio
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And they lived happily ever after. That’s how the fairy tales end.
And the real relationship shows up. The mask falls, the stressing routine, life as a couple. Everlasting honeymoon? What’s the recipe for a happy marriage?
What if the girl gets married without being in love? First boyfriend. Things got going, went all the way and the person goes on a bachelor trip. Meets someone that messes with her head… finds out that the fiancé is not her soul mate! Gives in in the name of the time spent, the commitment, the “what are they going to say about me”? Then comes a little ache, a little inconvenience, a light depression. Soon the joy of living fades away and only apathy is felt, will of sleeping, energy losses. Daily arguments… Is it worth it? It lacks courage to face a divorce!
“Love is not important, the primordial is to make the kids happy, family always united. That’s how my mom taught me…” Different times, different livings, different histories. Until death do you apart. And so she goes vegetating, with the illusion that she’s giving the best from herself to the kids. She forgets that they are only borrowed, with their own personalities. Has to satisfy all their wishes… To use the kids as an excuse not to face the dead relationship is too much! We have to prepare them for life, with lots of “yes and no”… but they grow and spread their wings… And then, what excuses to use to hold the relationship? Loneliness shared by two.
Everlasting friends, warm marriage, the heart doesn’t beat that hard no more… Does it work? Does it make you want to trade cards at night? Then they say: I don’t have reasons to get a divorce. I’m not in love with another person… The biggest reason is already there: They don’t love each other anymore. Don’t use the other person as a crutch! You have to leave because there’s no more love. It’s more honest, clearer. What if you don’t find another person? Gets desperate? You go back to the ex wife?
Let time do its part… Yes, there is a possibility! In that case, both learned from the experience, improved their self-knowledge, made use of their free will. What if she got another man? Be happy for her! Hope that everything work out!
Sometimes destiny plays with our feelings…
A happy couple: bought a land, built their dream house, complete harmony and balance. Kids are healthy, smarter and more beautiful everyday. Until a fatal accident takes at once wife and kids… So, live each day as if it was the last, enjoy the moments, everlasting instants. Don’t procrastinate life, it might be too late. Tomorrow, next week, next year… Tell your husband you love him everyday (if it’s true).
What about getting a lover? Is it the right solution? Continue my fake marriage, my kids, don’t have to share the goods and still have love. It’s combining the useful and the pleasant. What if you fall in love? Nobody tells the heart what to do… What if the husband finds out? What if you get pregnant? What if one day you decide to break up and the lover tells your husband to get back at you? Very complex…
Some couples, no matter how long the marriage lasts, live a life of complicity and romance. Love is always present, making the eyes sparkle, loving each other’s company. Everything right at the right time, encounter of souls, a love larger than life… It’s a matter of skin. Attraction: you either feel it or not… Saying that love will come, learning to like, that doesn’t work… Everlasting passion that makes the heart beat harder. That, indeed, is worth it. Love is the biggest force of this universe. Love many times, love many people and love in different ways. Love is beautiful.
